Monday, April 21, 2008

Last Class


This class really stunk. I didn't have fun or get anything from it. first I knew that we would talk about the assignment so I was quite because I didn't want to talk about it because I knew I didn't do it. Also when I was called out to talk about it I didn't want to B.S. my through it because I didn't do it at all. I thought about what I wanted to do. So then I felt stupid that I didn't BS and didn't have anything to talk about, and I felt humiliated because those who did BS got the 5000 or whatever amount of points it was and I didn't.

It was also hard getting called out in front of everyone telling how I am really feeling. It was good to get the truth out, but hard. I felt like a thousand eyes were starring at me. it's hard to connect with people that we have to connect with. I'm completely different in a different setting. At work and around my friends I can be completely myself and enjoy it. At work I sing and goof off all the time. It's scary for me to do that with people that I know have completely different views than me and aren't afraid to share them.

It's crazy because last week when I was so mad I had so many different overall ideas for my final project. So I am starting to think creatively ,but not in class.

1 comment:

spyroterra said...

I am really glad to hear your thoughts on all this. I know it was a very difficult class for you and I am sorry I made you feel so uncomfortable. But I think in an odd way it was good for you. I am so happy to hear that the extreme emotion you were feeling led to something creative, even if it was not during class. I really believe that most of the important impact of this course happens outside the classroom. I don't blame you for not coming to class. I would not either, if I were you. Why put yourself through all that if you don't have to? But I am happy you have not dismissed it out of hand. As for the points, you are going to get full credit for everything you have done, even if there were no tangible results. I think you have gotten more from this than you may realize. At least that is my impression. The biggest benefit I think you may realize is that you now know this sort of approach does not work for you. But at least you tried. And for that I thank you. A lesser person would have just walked away from the whole thing and never given it another thought. You had the courage to face it. And it is my opinion that you have actually been successful in this class. Not everyone succeeds in this class in the same way, and you are a shining example of someone who was willing to stick her neck out when push came to shove, and you shoved back. Bravo! I sincerely hope that this experience in some way resonates for you in other aspects of your life and it has not been a waste of your time. It has been a pleasure to get to know you. Thanks for your perseverance and good luck in the future! If you want to do the final project I really look forward to seeing what you came up with. But if not, that is your choice. Peace.